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Funniest Headline Eva!!!!


Since when did consuming small portions of food, dipped in melted cheese, become so bourgeois?

Drake, everyone’s favorite sports groupie, couldn’t help take, yet, another dig at Jay Z during yesterday’s NBA playoff game between the Brooklyn Nets and the Toronto Raptors. 

Here’s the direct “slam”: “This is the people’s team out here tonight, you know what I mean, Toronto Raptors.” Adding “Jay Z’s somewhere eating a fondue plate.”

"It’s our time, and we gotta keep it competitive," Drizzy said while being interviewed by sports commentators about his hometown’s team first playoff game since 2008. “It’s an ironic matchup.”

He didn’t clarify why the Raptors vs. the Nets was ironic, but perhaps he was referring to Jay Z’s previous affiliation with the Nets, as he once held ownership stake with the Brooklyn NBA team.

The last time Drizzy called out Jay Z for being bourgeois (though is fondue all that chichi?) was in a Rolling Stoneinterview in which he said:

"It’s like Hov can’t drop bars these days without at least four art references!" he says. "I would love to collect at some point, but I think the whole rap/art world thing is getting kind of corny."

Jay Z responded by collaborating with a verse on Jay Electronica's remix of Drake and Soulja Boy's “We Made It.”

In it, Hov raps: “Sorry Mr. Drizzy for so much art talk/ Silly me rappin’ ‘bout sh-t that I really bought/ Why these rappers rap about guns they ain’t shot?/ And a bunch of other silly sh-t that they ain’t got.”

We’re almost sure Hov won’t keep quiet about this latest put down. A fondue verse has to be in the works by now, right? 50 Cent was right though, this beef is just getting started.

Filed under drake jay-z fuse tv rap rap beef music hip hop

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Lady Gaga’s Daily Morning Routine: Applying Facelift Tape

“‘How am I going to form my eyes today with this tape? How will I pull back my neck with tape?’” 

Saying that Lady Gaga is a pro at eclectic transformations is a huge understatement. Her outer appearance, whether she’s donning a meat dress, sporting a new hair color, or being slathered in paint, sometimes radiates louder than her music. Each look is a critical statement and Gaga has never denied that. Now Mother Monster is opening up about a new trick of the trade, a surprising beauty regimen that is sort of shocking for the singer who just turned 28: facelift tape. 

In an interview with the Daily Mirror the pop star discloses her very particular daily morning routine, which includes figuring out what sort of look she’d like to portray on that day.

"When I have my wig cap on and I’m taping my face, it’s a sort of meditation for me. Every day, it starts the same way. It’s like a mantra. I wash my face, I pin my hair back and put on a wig cap and I ask, ‘How am I going to form my eyes today with this tape? How will I pull back my neck with tape?’" 

Gaga’s look can be distinctively different from day-to-day, but we’d never take her for using facelift tape. Her varied appearance always seemed to be smoke and mirrors, and simply crafty makeup. She adds that her use of tape, to shape her cheeks and eyes, comes from a place of honesty. 

“Looking artificial can be honest. Being glamorous can come from a place of authenticity and a place of love,” she said. 

The Daily Mirror also contacted a plastic surgeon to get an expert opinion on Gaga’s beauty techniques and the harmful effects facelift tape can have.

"By taping your face tight, you are reducing the circulation which means there are less nutrients getting to the skin, so abnormal collagen will be produced," Jeya Prakash said. "This is like internal scarring as different types of cells form the skin - like with a scar. In the long term, it will speed up the ageing process." 

You hear that little monsters? Don’t scurry off and start taping up your faces.

Filed under lady gaga fuse tv araceli cruz music plastic surgery

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Lily Allen: Song That Mentions Menstruation Is Not Radio-Friendly

"I think that ‘period’ is going to be my ‘surfboard’" Allen says. Amen!

Lily Allen has never been one to shy away from being controversial and speaking her mind, but the new Allen (married and mother of two) is refraining a tiny bit, sort of. Her songwriting is still legitimately 100 percent Allen, but the radio-waves get a slightly demure version.

The singer tells Rolling Stone that she intended her first single to be “Sheezus,” the title track off her new album, but was forced to choose songs that were more radio-friendly. “I would have liked to see ‘Sheezus’ as a single, but it’s not up-tempo enough. It’s also got the word ‘period’ in it, which is really offensive to people, even though half the world has to deal with it once a month.”

She calls “Air Balloon” and “L8 CMMR” “docile pop”, and said those tracks were chosen as singles because labels and radio stations “won’t play the better stuff.”

"I think that ‘period’ is going to be my ‘surfboard’," she said in regards to to its controversial lyrics. "It’s groundbreaking! I’m proud of that…People will wear sweatshirts to my concerts that are just going to say ‘period’."

Allen also says that record executives “freaked out” when she attempted to change her performing name to her new married name, Lily Cooper.

"They convinced me that it could be a massive contributing factor to my failure, so I was like, ‘OK,’" which is why she says she’s looking forward to her contract ending after two more releases.

Filed under lily allen fuse tv araceli cruz music

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I, too, am a domestic enigma.

Filed under New York Magazine kristen dunst

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